E S P A C E

Bilal Labil
9 min readOct 20, 2022

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I still wondering my 4 years ago decision that took an architecture as a torture major in college. It was the fastest option choosing and fatal one that I’ve ever made. I mean, I’ve found a university brochure that talking about engineer field in garage. A plentiful of majors, but I have to choose the one that needed some drawing skill, because I grew up with manga and Weebs you know, so architecture got my attention. With a due last national college enrollment, I applied that thing and done some draw and math test, then I pass. That fast and easy, I have no idea why it so damn quick. But that’s it.

Never expected to learn live perspective through architecture. We got to learn how to learn and it fascinating. Sometimes, you try to be an adult for yourself or just asking yourself what are you. Taking 4 years in university isn’t as difference as gambling, you got to face every possibility which means success and fail. Other than that, basically we prepared to be an architect, in other words making our space sense sharpened. There’s a vary meaning in space. When it comes to space, we are not just talking about how each room or park interacted, but the space that we can’t see. The boundaries space. This kind of space is more flexible than we thought, because we can’t just justify each personal space with others. For example, a mother mostly considered as a private relation but in a unique cases, a mother can be a semi-private or semi-public due to some unique condition in a person. But in this article, instead of human interaction space, I’m going to share some self-interaction space that apparently most people forget or even don’t know.

I have to say that mind palace is so underrated. People always asking how to handle the memorization, and whatever the subject, you simply should make your own mind palace. Also called memory theatre or memory journey, a mind palace is a mnemonic device that has been around at least as long as the ancient Greeks. According to its name, you literally make your own place and “placing” the memory in every corner of your palace, or house if you want. But what if our self has its own self palace? Have you ever talked to yourself just for asking some rational advice or cringe to your dumbest moment? Have you ever escaped to your “safe place”? Thinking every possibility of the way you communicate something? I called them self palace.

Just like mind palace work, self palace just try to show you how your feeling is like. The impact of it will clearly showed to the way you convey your idea to certain people. Friends, stranger, your crush, your ex-boyfriend, your other crush, mother, father, little sister, that annoying little sister and so on. It just how you try to communicate your feeling with “others” projection of yourself, which is normal and fine. This sort of self-reflection tend to make you understand what’s going on with you. It can be knowing your unconscious self or your inner child condition.

axonometric of self palace

Here is the example of how I pathetically try to say something to my crush in 6 different ways.

[1]

Midnightpretenderstuespaldaconmismanostocarheyunlamentoquecaediscretouneasyheartjustrespirolentoligerodormircomounpezquesecansamientrasnadaenelmarsoperotuduermesprofundoysinpesarhowmuchiloveyoulaembarcacionnosllevaalosdosvamosvagabundosdenocheenelmarknowmepreguntodondeiralacorrientequenosarrastrathateverytimeiwishmonopolizeyourlovesoyunaviajerasindestinoniamorieverytimeiwishthatyouwouldbeminesoloquieroquemeentreguestodoymasadoremidnightpretendersmeocultoenplenaoscuridadyou.

[2]

crossword

Across

1. used to refer to a person, object, idea, etc. that is separated from the speaker by space or time; this antonym

2. to have information in your mind; I want to … what love is~

3. used as a way of attracting someone’s attention, sometimes in a way that is not very polite; yeh backward; oi

4. only, simply; …ien f’kin Bieber

Down

1. to love someone very much, especially in a way that shows a lot of admiration or respect, or to like something very much; harry cutes music

2. the person or people spoken to; the best man on earth

3. very, extremely, or to such a degree; Day to night to morning, keep with me in the moment, I’d let you had I known it, why don’t you say…?; SOS with one S

S̶i̶n̶g̶l̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶d̶y̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶i̶n̶g̶l̶e̶

1. the ninth letter of the English alphabet; sounds like eye but not eye but me

[3]

namow sdeen a nam nur sa tsaf sa ehs nac ekat eht sriats owt yb owt sbarg reh sehtolc dna gnihtyna taht swolg sa ehs skool tuo morf eht egde ereht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh gnuoy nam htiw on nalp seod revetahw eh nac gnidnefed sgniht taht eh tnac ees skcip pu sih taoc dna sepiw sih dedoolb eson dna eh sdnats tou no eht egde ereht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh eht pihs fo nommoc esnes sah delias teg ruoy sevitcepsrep ni eht liam tub rebmemer nehw ti lla semoc gnihsrac nwod yeht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh namow htiw gnuoy nam gnivil reh sefil nalp ssroc hcae rehto ni eht llah krow rieht stfihs dna yldrah klat ta lla dna yeht htob devil noeht egde gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas

[4]

8-5–25 10–21–19–20 19–15 | 25–15–21 11–14–15–23 20–81–20 | 9 1-4–15–18-5 25–15–21

[5]

14TH FEBRUARY, 01:00 AM

God must be in the good mood when making you

Because beauty never been this fit in creation before

Butt it is Adam and apple scenario

And you are an apple for my Adam role, an Adam’s apple

Just kiddin’, you’re an apple of my eye

We both traveler until we met in translation

My Martian for your Spanish

You are so good at it you can’t even fake it with your native accent

You never failed to speak

Butt God knows how much I pray for you to accidentally say your name

In your breathing, in your raspy

Damn, Spanish never been this sexier before

You knew the lust that I bare

Just don’t love me back

Because this hopeless fuel makes me understand myself

Because I can see myself in you

Don’t die, boy. Don’t die, man. Don’t die, honey.

Because dyin’ makes you a human

4 hours apart and we choose the same night

I had the most of you

You are pretty and prettier in my head

God, just tell me your flaws

So I can be loved you, until 30th February

[6]

obnoxious typo

All those 6 different things, apparently just me try to say “hey just so you know that I adore you” to my crush. Like, you see, it’s in different way due to my various room in self palace. The [1] is like a regular “room” one because you just need one solution to get the message i.e. by put the space in every word. The rest is just a lyric from midnight pretender Spanish cover by Nattalia Sarria. This song just makes me try to remember and forget him in the same time.

[1]

Midnightpretenderstuespaldaconmismanostocarheyunlamentoquecaediscretouneasyheartjustrespirolentoligerodormircomounpezquesecansamientrasnadaenelmarsoperotuduermesprofundoysinpesarhowmuchiloveyoulaembarcacionnosllevaalosdosvamosvagabundosdenocheenelmarknowmepreguntodondeiralacorrientequenosarrastrathateverytimeiwishmonopolizeyourlovesoyunaviajerasindestinoniamorieverytimeiwishthatyouwouldbeminesoloquieroquemeentreguestodoymasadoremidnightpretendersmeocultoenplenaoscuridadyou.

The [2] is like an outdoor “room” version, makes it more interesting. Exploring such a way to convey your self palace message idea to word always intriguing me. Because you never know what kind of “word shape” that creativity will be bring you to. This kind of finding-answer tend to be more playful and nostalgic, and this process is so fun and warm just like outdoor room supposed to be.

[2]

Here is the most tricky one, because we got some labyrinth room. I got some anagram and poliandrum, making sure that this is how maze metaphor would look like in word. But I got to choose the easier one, and it is anagram. With some beautiful lyric from Bill Hicks — nothing changes, smashed “hey just so you know that I adore you” in every line [3]. Honestly, I would love to have a poliandrum one, but it just that difficult. So the [4] one is just a bunch of alphabetical number and it looks kind of labyrinth to me.

answered crossword

[3]

namow sdeen a nam nur sa tsaf sa ehs nac ekat eht sriats owt yb owt sbarg reh sehtolc dna gnihtyna taht swolg sa ehs skool tuo morf eht egde ereht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh gnuoy nam htiw on nalp seod revetahw eh nac gnidnefed sgniht taht eh tnac ees skcip pu sih taoc dna sepiw sih dedoolb eson dna eh sdnats tou no eht egde ereht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh eht pihs fo nommoc esnes sah delias teg ruoy sevitcepsrep ni eht liam tub rebmemer nehw ti lla semoc gnihsrac nwod yeht gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas uoy aroda i taht wonk ouy os tsuj yeh namow htiw gnuoy nam gnivil reh sefil nalp ssroc hcae rehto ni eht llah krow rieht stfihs dna yldrah klat ta lla dna yeht htob devil noeht egde gnidart modeerf rof eht sniahc gnihton segnahc — syats eht emas

woman needs a man run as fast as she can take the stairs two by two grabs her clothes and anything that glows as she looks out from the edge there trading freedom for the chains nothing changes — stays the same hey just so you know that i adore you young man with no plan does whatever he can defending things that he can’t see picks up his coat and wipes his blooded nose and he stands out on the edge there trading freedom for the chains nothing changes — stays the same hey just so you know that i adore you the ship of common sense has sailed get your perspectives in the mail

but remember when it all comes crashing down they traded freedom for the chains nothing changes — stays the same hey just so you know that i adore you woman with young man living her lifes plan cross each other in the hall work their shifts, and hardly talk at all and they both lived on the edge trading freedom for the chains nothing changes — stays the same

[4]

8-5–25 10–21–19–20 19–15 | 25–15–21 11–14–15–23 20–81–20 | 9 1-4–15–18-5 25–15–21

H-e-y j-u-s-t s-o y-o-u k-n-o-w t-h-a-t I a-d-o-r-e y-o-u

Poetry. I made a cute poetry for him in [5]. Simply put, it just hey-just-so-you-know-that-I-adore-you longer version. The [6] awesomely drag me from my comfort zone. I mean, I learn some typographic design in a week for him. Just so you know that this is the most berserker mode one, because it supposed to be a “surprise” room exploration, the room that you never expected to existed.

And yeah, it will be fun how my first impression to him. Do I start it with the obvious one like [6] or like most of the people do [1] or much clearer because he really good at catching or knowing that people surround him is liking him that much (“hey just so you know that I adore you”). And that’s my experience about my own space.

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Bilal Labil
Bilal Labil

Written by Bilal Labil

Hai, just sharing my thoughts

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